Please Don't Be Jealous of My Glamorous Life

Someday, I will look back with fondness and longing for the days when my babies were just that...cuddly, adorable, absolute little angels of babies.  Then I will read this post and be reminded otherwise.

A chronology of our morning:

7:00 am:  Feed Caden.  Consider getting up for the day, since it's when I usually do. Decide HELLZ NO. If Brooklyn gets to sleep, I get to sleep.  Girls sleeping in FTW!

7:30 am:  Still awake, listening to Brooklyn moving around in her crib.  Is she going to wake up?  Is she going to stay asleep?  Oh God, should I bother trying to sleep or not? What do I do?!?

8:00 am:  Get woken up by Tyson asking, "Are you awake?"  Um...I am now.  Confused, think  for sure it is at least 9:00 am.  Nope.  But Caden is awake so he comes to cuddle with me in bed while Tyson showers.  Melt because he keeps cooing at me as I doze.

8:15 am:  Be informed by Tyson that he is leaving for campus "within the next hour".  Think about staying in bed.  Think better of it once realizing the likelihood of being able to shower after he leaves.  Get up.

8:18 am:  Take a two-minute shower.  Don't wash hair.  Get dressed, throw in some dry shampoo and put on a smidge of makeup to look human.  Call it good.  And I'm wearing a clean shirt.

8:40 am:  Brooklyn is officially awake.  Change diaper and put clean onesie on for the day.

8:55 am:  Feed Brooklyn.

9:00 am:  Say good-bye to Daddy.

9:06 am:  Get spit up on.  Clean shirt, LOL.  Change shirt.

9:10 am:  Put laundry in dryer.

9:17 am:  Pour myself an iced coffee.  Start to warm up oatmeal because Caden looks super content right now and likely won't need to eat anytime soon.

9:18 am:  Caden decides he is hungry.

9:20 am:  Change Caden's diaper, put clean onesie on for the day, and feed.  At least I got coffee.

9:30 am:  Brooklyn is hungry again.  Like OMG SO HUNGRY I HAVEN'T BEEN FED IN DAAAYYYYSSSS!!!!!11!1!!  It's been half an hour.

9:35 am:  Feed Brooklyn.

9:45 am:  Re-warm up oatmeal and EAT IT.  Success!!!

10:00 am:  Pump milk for the freezer stash.

10:15 am:  Playtime!  Rock out to 90s music because mommy can't take "The Wheels on the Bus" one more time.  Soak up all the smiles and coos they are blessing me with lately. Hold Caden almost the entire time because apparently laying on the floor for playtime today = not cool, but being held during playtime = the best thing ever.  Fair enough.

10:45 am:  Change and feed Caden.  Burp, cuddle, rock, and put him down for a nap.  

11:20 am:  Change Brooklyn's diaper and peed-through onesie.  Feed.

11:35 am:  Get spit up on.  Change shirt.

11:40 am:  Attempt to put Brooklyn down for a nap.

11:45 am:  FOOL!  Cool babies don't take naps today.  Take Brooklyn out of crib because for the LOVE OF GOD YOU BETTER NOT WAKE UP YOUR PEACEFULLY SLEEPING BROTHER.

Noon:  Holy crap it's already noon?!?  So far I've fed babies 5847 times and been spit up on. LOL at loads of (clean!) laundry sitting in baskets on the floor waiting to be put away since yesterday.

12:02 pm:  Feed Brooklyn because-surprise!-hungry again!  

12:15 pm:  Put Brooklyn down for a nap.

12:20 pm:  Warm up leftover pasta for lunch.  Watch an old episode of Mad Men while eating.  Brooklyn squirms next to me on the couch because DUH!  Cool babies STILL don't take naps today!  Also she has the hiccups.

12:34 pm:  Ok, so cool babies just don't take naps in their CRIBS today.  Brooklyn is asleep next to me on the couch.  Move her to her crib VERY carefully.  The process resembles someone handling a live bomb.

12:35 pm:  Both babies are asleep in their cribs at the same time.  I.  AM.  SUPERMOM.

12:46 pm:  Realize that at some point my shirt has been spit-up on again.  And my pants. Shrug and get on with my day.