- Power goes out. All the lights, TV, oven, washer, microwave, power off on a cloudy evening, leaving you in a nearly dark and now eerily quiet room with two small toddlers.
- Power flickers back on. For about 1.2 seconds.
- Power goes out again.
- Power flickers back on. For about .83 seconds.
- Power goes out and stays out. Toddlers panic.
- You panic.
- It's 10 minutes to dinnertime.
- Look at oven, where dinner is sitting, half-cooked.
- I know! I'll just put it in the microwave!
- Oh, wait...
- Um...
- Toddlers cling to you for dear life.
- I guess we'll go...out?
- Change a diaper with one child wrapped around your upper body like a small monkey.
- Frantically pack diaper bag in the mostly-darkness.
- Try to find three pairs of matching shoes.
- Open door to hallway. Hallway is also (duh) pitch dark.
- Hallway is scary. 22-lb. toddlers both need to be carried.
- Get toddlers to car, in car, and to restaurant.
- Restaurant specializes in burgers. Order burger.
- When burger arrives, wonder why on EARTH you ordered a burger when you've had a weird aversion this entire pregnancy to ground beef in any shape or form, you IDIOT. Take two small bites and nearly vomit in disgust.
- Eat mostly french fries.
- Leave restaurant in the pouring rain. Toddlers are encased in stroller, but by the time two kids and a stroller are packed into the van, you are a wet mess.
- Hair is totally a puffy-humidity-frizz-ball. You realize you have a lot else going on at the moment but come ON.
- Get home. Lights, TV, washer, are all brightly, noisily, gloriously back on. (But not the oven, because you are an ADULT and realized it should probably be turned off before you left, in case it came back on while you were gone, and you're not really sure why but it seems like the right thing to do so blah blah REASONS.) Sigh in relief.
